20100625

First off, I refuse to acknowledge Michael Jackson.
....dangit.

Are you willing to sacrifice the life of your child or lover to support a war?
This question was taken from "25 Questions that provoke thought".
Sauce.

I'd like to answer this question. My "lover" joined the Army. He joined the Army to fight for the United States of America, to fight for every citizen's freedom. I didn't "sacrifice" him. He chose to answer the higher calling of the military. He chose to give your sons and daughters, your mothers and fathers, your sisters and brothers the freedoms you take for granted every day.

This is now going to branch off into a tangent about the Westboro Baptist Church. Does anyone else find it funny that they exercise their right to free speech but it's the "fag sin" soldiers that give them that right. That shit doesn't happen in Korea, because no one has rights there. But hey, be my guest move to fucking Korea. Another thing about WBC, they use computers and internet as propaganda, right? ( Really? ) A homosexual invented the computer. :]

Irony.
I has it.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand.

I didn't sacrifice anything. He sacrificed everything.

Thank a veteran.

20100614

Smells I absolutely love/hate:
-Dryer Sheets: Love
-My Dad: Love
-Higher Energy: Love
-Feet: Hate
-Rain (ozone): Love
-Newspaper: Love
-New shoes: Love
-Coconut: Hate
-Gasoline: Love
-Crayons: Love
-Playdoh: Love
-Cumin: Love and Hate, sometimes it smells like BO and sometimes it smells like chili.

20100608

I'm reading this book, well more like writing in, it's called "List Your Self" by Ilene Segalove. It's all topics for you to make lists about so I've decided to do a list series (like I've already started, sort of)

Things the world would be better without:
-Really long red lights.
-Addictive personalities.
-Free speech, Oh the conundrum.
-Headaches.
-Vertigo.
-Shoes.
-Bad music.
-Jaded kids.
-Bad Parents.
-Her.
-Him.
-Tummy aches.
-Vomit.
-The need to do dishes.
secretly, I kinda like the world the way it is though, I'm scared of change.

20100604

Now that you're out of my life I feel so free. I can hate who I want. I can love who I can't. I can see where I should be. I can go where I shouldn't.

Man it feels good.

I'm just going to get this out there, I'm not a very accepting person, I thought you were wrong every step you made. I thought you were a disgrace to humanity, oh maybe that's because you are.

We aren't friends not because you're a dirty hooker, not because you're a liar, not because you're a loud mouth and not because you're so deep in drugs I don't recognize you.

Because I grew up, and you didn't.

06032010

Things I love about you:
The taste of your smile.
The smell of your neck.
The calm you bring.
The way you play.
The moments you're serious.
The songs we share.
The seconds we are silent.
The way you treat me like nothing in the world could ever replace me.
The sudden growing up you've done.
The things that remind me of you.
The spaces between your fingers.
The way mine fit perfectly.
How big of a cliche we are.
No matter what the Government says, you're my property.

20100603

how come i cant shit out a poem when i really need the release.
ugh.
pent up.
I need words to flow or I'm going to burst.

perhaps a poem about needing to write a poem?

what a calamity.

Speaking of calamity, if you read this.
You're a goodfornothingfriendstealingdirtynastycrackedoutstankmouthslut.

:] just so we're clear, if you try to even talk to him I will strangle you with your umbilical cord at birth, yep I went there.

20100531

If the world was full of more:

Motorcyclists that use hand signals.
Places that are so beautiful I wish there wasn't a road running through them.
Houses that you feel comfortable in.
Best friends.
Drunk Gay guys.
Dogs that recognize you.
Smiles.
People that can keep secrets.
Friends that get mad at someone that's wronged you.
New Luda songs.
Sarcasm.
The 1990's
Love.
Good high school teachers, that cry on your last day.

This would be a beautiful world.

20100519....er 20?

Planning. In my head it all seems so nice, I just hope I'm a psychic guru and that's what will really happen.

Its late, sleep.

20100518

Some days all I want to do is lay in bed and sleep. I mean now that I have the ability to do that it's all I think of. Of course, there's always that bastard voice in the back of my mind that screams Get up and do something! I imagine he has a scottish accent, it makes it seem more real and forceful. My subconscious is fuck't.

Some days all I want to do is get out of bed and forget he's gone. Even though I know deep down I can, the ability to erase him from my mind is impossible. Of course, he isn't the sole thing I think of, but he's the majority. I just miss him, I imagine he misses me too, he says so.

By the way, today is our anniversary.
How cute.

20100513

FEATURED PERSON:

Well this is my first featured person.


"Ludacris."
Christopher Brian Bridges. He's sold 24 MILLION albums world wide (I'd like to point out the last Ludacris CD I bought was $12.) I'd like to point out something a lot of people don't know, Ludacris was born in Champain Illinois. I mean, come onnnnnn. ILLINOIS. Duh, obviously all great there. Anyway, Ludacris is my favorite mainstream rap artist. Recently he collaborated with none other than.....

JUSTIN BIEBER


Oh Luda, what have you gotten yourself into? Now 12 year olds are looking up the "dirty south mouth" I secretly love. I mean come on, Ludcris has a daughter named Karma. I'm sure she loves Bieber, she's female, younger than 20 (she's 8) and well...probably has Bieber fever. I bet he wouldn't appreciate his daughter looking up "Blueberry Yum Yum" or "Area Codes".

This just proves one thing.

JUSTIN BIEBER IS HERE TO RUIN THE WORLD.

20100512 (part 1?)

why does my foot still hurt.

im in a lot of pain right now, I will post a real post tomorrow, or later depending on my creativity flow or lack of.

20100511

Until I closed the door and we drove off.

And it all still seems unreal.

Where do I go from here?

20100510

Today I woke up with a sore throat and topped off the day with a migraine. How gracious. In spite of the bad health though I got letters in the mail today from the beloved. How nice it is to see his handwriting, how nice it is to sniff the pages and smell his hands. (I promise, any letter you get will smell like his/her hands, sniff) How nice it is to know someone was thinking of me and that someone cares.

I'm going to try to update this blog as often as possible, maybe once a day maybe once every other day we never know. I want to fill it with things I know in 10 years when I read back over this is I will look back and say man, I lived the life I wanted to live. I did the right thing.

I can start off with this:

in·teg·ri·ty (n-tgr-t)

n.

1. Steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code.

2. The state of being unimpaired; soundness.

3. The quality or condition of being whole or undivided; completeness.